On Friday, a man armed with two machetes attacked a military patrol at the Carrousel du Louvre,
an underground shopping centre in Paris. He injured a soldier, and was
himself wounded in the stomach by bullets fired by another soldier.
Donald Trump Responded:
Egie Wild (a
pseudonym), an English-speaking Parisian, decided to answer the American
president, point by point, via a Facebook post. Since she wrote it on
Friday, her post has been shared over 200,000 times.
so the thing about my family is that we have two ancestors on my dad’s side who were buried in france, where I currently live. one died in the spanish civil war, and one died prior doing…we don’t know what. but he somehow managed to get buried in père lachaise.
so anyhow, my gran sends me a message like “pls put flowers on ur uncle samuel’s grave because he’s gone over a century with none and it will make the ghost mad if he hasn’t already” because my family spends time in europe but never long enough to go all the way to père lachaise and give ya boy samuel jr. his death rites. so im like “ok gran I can do that” bc im a good grandson and you do not fuck with gran she doesn’t DESERVE THAT
i figure out which plot he’s on and ask someone specifically where you can find uncle samuel jr. and they tell me where and so I arrive at the junction and.
HE GONE.
WHERE DID YOU GO UNCLE SAMUEL.
*celine dion’s smash hit “my heart will go on” playing in the distance*
in other words either someone stole my entire great great uncle samuel or he has risen again, ready to party in paris for all of eternity.
You’re pretty chill about a corpse disappearing.
My guy, my dude, he’s been dead since 1851. He could be anywhere. He does what he wants.
I spent like about a minute checking to see if there was a reblog button anywhere because I though for sure this was a joke but it’s not it’s not a joke
Manhattan subway gets covered in Swastikas on every advertisement. One guy got up and said, “Hand sanitizer gets rid of Sharpie. We need alcohol.” The passengers all reached into their bags and pockets looking for tissues and Purel and got to work.(Source)
Part of the New Internet Grammar: using question marks not to denote questions, but upturns in voice, so that a tentative statement gets a question mark but a flatly delivered question doesn’t.
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